Random Tuesday Thoughts

 

So it's been a couple weeks since I promised to start blogging again.  I suck at this game, but I've been in my "empty box".  And I like it there.

I start my new job on Monday and I'm super excited.  I hadn't planned on going back to work outside the home for another couple years, but I think I've found the perfect job for me... so it's a good change.

My loving Andy and I were at church for the Stupid Bowl Party on Sunday.  I saw a lady with a haircut similar to mine and said something like, "Her hair looks almost like mine."  Andy's response:  "All middle-aged white ladies have haircuts like yours."  To add insult to injury, he further explains by stating, "It's like when I bought my truck... I didn't notice all the blue Dodge's until I had one." That explains the dual-cab sized behind I keeping dragging around with me.  Thanks Andy.  Love you too.

Mark Gungor is a genius.  Pure genius.  And he's pretty funny too.  Andy and I joined a small group thing at church where we discuss Gungor's Laugh Your Way to a Better Marriage DVD's.  According to Gungor, men's brains are filled with tiny, single-task oriented boxes.  There is a box for work, a box for cleaning, a box for sports, a box for sex (that box is probably bigger than the rest) and get this... there is a "nothing" box.  When they are done with the task at hand, let's say changing the oil in the car, they close the box, put it back where it goes and proceed on to the next box.  It's important not to interrupt them while they are in a certain box because they won't retain a word you've said.  I believe that.  Especially when they are in the nothing box.  And there really is nothing in there.  N.O.T.H.I.N.G.  And they won't let us in there to see what it's all about because they think we will want to throw some paint on the walls, put up a curtain or two and add a nice throw rug.  Yanno, to make it more cozy.  So the next time you ask your dear husband, "What are you thinking about" and he replies, "Uh.... nothing," it's probably true.  Don't fret.  Soon enough they'll put that stupid little nothing box away and get out another one.  

Andy bought me a ginormous bag of peanuts from a street vendor the other day.  And I love him dearly for it.  Now I can sit on the couch, stare at the TV and hork down 5 lbs of peanuts.  My theory:  If he gets a "nothing" box then I get an "empty box".  I've come to adore my empty box.  It's like taking a mental health day, only shorter.

I have a love/hate relationship with tax time.  I love that we still get refunds.  We might even pop out a couple more kids just to ensure the money keeps coming in.  Kind of like life-long welfare moms having babies to get a raise.  It works for them.  The only problem is tax time comes right after Christmas time.  That's stupid.  It should be during the summer, say July, when we take our Florida vacation every year.  Not when we are still playing catch up for going overboard buying Christmas presents for every kid in Oklahoma.  Perhaps if I didn't expect a refund I wouldn't spend so much on Christmas.  Wishful thinking, I'm sure.  It just seems every year we end up paying off things instead of getting to treat ourselves to a new fridge (one that closes without hurling 200 pounds of body weight against it), or a new livingroom suite (one that doesn't have springs stabbing you in the rump from a houseful of folks plopping bodies on it), or even a new bedroom set (preferably with mattresses that don't squeak so the kids won't hear about "mommy and daddy time").  

I've often wondered something.  I'll be in the livingroom playing working on the computer with my back to the TV, but I'm still listening to the program that's on.  Andy will come in there, snatch up the remote and change the channel to something sports related without a second thought.  Bleh.  But when he's in bed and he hears me coming down the hall on my way to bed, he hurries up to turn the TV on George Lopez or Roseanne because he knows I love those two shows.  Why doesn't that same thought process apply in the livingroom? 

That's all for my random thoughts.  I should probably get some work done today.  

Toodles.

RTT:

It's that time again! Go on over to Keely's at The UnMom, grab the button, feel up Mr. Linky and do the damn thang!

Here's how my mind is working today, randomly:

It's 8:53 and these kids are driving me bonkers. The older two are babysitting the smaller ones and apparently Monkey Boy has taken it upon himself to pay Big K back for stealing a toy by attempting to chew her arm off. So he's sitting right here, next to me, so close I could reach down and yank out all his teeth.

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School starts back tomorrow and this semester (knock on wood) looks like it's going to be a piece of cake. Social Class in America is my first class... pffffft... it's gonna be a breeze. One gripe I have though is why does every class have a flippin oral presentation. That's crap. Why can't I just write my research papers like any normal person and turn the shit it. Nooooooooo, I've got to do a research paper and prepare an oral presentation, provide a hand-out for the class bulleting everything I'm going to talk about in 5 minutes and pray I don't piss my pants.

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I haven't heard from my sister in three days. That means the heffa is out on some damn island somewhere via a fancy damn cruiseship snorkling and diving and having Pedro the cabana boy bring her some fruity umbrella drink, basically living it up while I'm hiding out in my garage from the 6 monsters in my house. Something is definitely wrong with that picture. Wrong!

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So Andy's new position at work seems to be keeping him entertained. He comes home and rambles about papers or somebody didn't get their papers back or some shit and I have no clue what he's talking about. I just smile and nod. He gets really excited about it though, so it must be fun lol.

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My laptop is a gonner. I'm pretty pissed about that. It had all my hijacked programs on it like Microsoft Office and the full version of Adobe. Now I'm screwed. I've messed with it and messed with it and I can't repair it. I'm either going to have to rely on the PCtards with the clown car to fix it or just blow the drive and start from scratch. Grrrr!

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Yesterday Andy (my pedicure givin' man) wakes me up like this: "Get up and fix me my coffee!"

Say what? I get up, pee on my hands a little and then go fix his coffee right up. One cup of coffee coming right up Sir! Then before bed I mentioned how rude he was in the morning.

This morning Andy (my pedicure givin' pissy coffee drinkin man) wakes me up like this: ____________

Wait! There's nothing there. Because that asshead didn't wake me up. His response to my attitude at being woken up like some petticoat wearing broad from Outhouse on the Prairie was to NOT wake me up at all.

Does that make any sense?

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I don't understand why our water bill keeps going down in the summer, especially since we are watering the garden 2-3 times a day now. Maybe we don't bathe enough.

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We went grocery shopping the other day. We took 3 of the 4 kids with us (Nisha was at my friend's house); 10, 4 and 3. So Andy's got one buggy with Monkey Boy and Baby Love riding in it. I've got the other cart trying to figure out what I've got a coupon for, comparing prices, browsing. I get out my coupons for salad dressing and try to find this Spritzer shit (that we don't use) because I want to try it out (solely b/c I have a coupon for it) and there is this broad standing right in the way. She's putting like 95 bottles of ranch in her buggy and leaning over right in my way. Finally I think she's done and she only moves her cart up about 7 inches. I look at Andy and sigh. I'm about to push her down so I can get my fancy flippin Salad Spritzer when she looks up at me. Our eyes meet... and she just stares. I'm like... kinda weirded out. She reaches down into her puss-pouch thingy and pulls out, I kid you not, 3409857345 coupons, all sorted and like ones stapled together. I've never seen anyone with 47 coupons for the same thing. She offers me a coupon for Kool-aid. She says, "They've got it on sale for 12 for a $1 and you only need 10 to get $2 off a bag of sugar, and they have sugar over there for $2 so it's like you get the sugar free." "Thank you kind Coupon Bandit," I tell her as I snatch up the coupon. She's out of the way of the fancy Salad Spritzer so I move in. Then... she comes back. "You like ranch dressing?" "Why yes, Coupon Bandit, we love ranch dressing!" So she gives me another coupon for $1 off a Kraft ranch dressing, which happens to be on sale for a $1. She gives me a lesson in coupon clipping and Andy asked me if I took notes. Andy hopes one day I'll be like the Coupon Bandit and save tons of money by buying 47 ranch bottles in one day and getting them all for free... minus the $1.25 x 47 that it cost for the Sunday papers. Either way, I saved almost $20 on the grocery bill that day. Nevermind that the bill was $400.

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There ya have it. My randomness for the week. Now go play along and Happy Tuesday folks!

RTT: Craigslist, Darts and Mormons

Go get your button from Keely's place and play along. It seems all my thoughts are random these days so this shouldn't be too hard lol

Not too long ago, Andy made friends with the Mormons who visit house to house, ringing doorbells and offering their Lighthouse pamphlets. They know him by name and if anyone but Andy answers the door, they ask for him. Don't get me wrong, I don't have a problem with these people in the least, and I get a kick of watching Andy squirm while he's trying to find a reason to tell them to scram. He's totally not into the whole "organized religion" scheme and avoids talk of religion at all costs. I like watching him squirm for a few minutes before I holler out his escape code, "Andy! You've got bacon burning on the stove!" I'm sure they've figured out that bacon on the stove, the kid with strep and mother-in-law on the phone are all excuses, nonetheless, Andy takes the pamphlet and wishes them a good day.

I'm addicted to Craigslist. Completely. It's hopeless. I love the feeling of a bargain, and this is almost as fun as yard sale shopping. This way I know what I'm getting, have everything arranged and just go pick it up. Sometimes they actually will meet you somewhere. When we moved into our new house, we sold half of our stuff on Craigslist and used the money to buy new stuff. Too much fun! Sunday I hollered to Andy, who was doing some light reading in the bathroom, that someone has just (and by "just" I mean only 3 minutes ago, b/c I'm a craigslist stalker) posted that the leftovers from their garage sale were all FREE and sitting by the curb. It was just down the street and around the corner from our house and they said there was a TV and VCR, some kitchen stuff, baby stuff, "and lots more". We scurried over there and looked like dumpster divers throwing everything in the back of the truck. But it was free, and even though we had to dig through boxes of someone else's junk, throwing away a lot of the stuff, we scored a small TV and VCR for the 3 and 4-y/o room, about 20 movies, 15 or so CDs, a lamp for the livingroom, and some arts and crafts stuff. FREE! I love FREE shit!

Pepsi is my friend and I will never foresake thee. Ever.

The oldest is gone all week to my friends house in the sticks and I miss her. I want her to come home so I can yell at her about how she lets her room looks like a pig sty and remind her she needs to rinse off the dishes before putting them in the dishwasher. :(

Oh - we also scored a wireless router in the craigslist dumpster diving escapade. How cool is that?!

Last Wednesday after dart league Andy and I decided to stick around for a tournament. There was a deaf guy sitting at a table who wanted to play, but nobody knew. I, being the uber-friendly drunk one, decided to fingerspell to him and use the little sign that I remembered. He said he wanted to play, held out his five bucks for his entry fee and we found out that they had already called teams. Well, being the pushy people we are, we forced asked the one running the tournament to let him in and redraw. All was good. He got a good partner (especially if you ask her) and we assured the other players that earth would continue to orbit now. We had done our good deed. Pfffffffft! That jackass decided mid-way through the tourney that he didn't want to play anymore and left his partner hanging. Being nice gets me absofuckinglutely no where!

I sprained my wrist somehow yesterday so I can't work without severe pain, however, I am able to type this long ass blog entry without a problem. Go figure. (I love you Andy and I promise I will get to work... as soon as I'm done here... honest honest)

RTT: Sims 2, One Missed Call & Projectile Vomit

Random Tuesday Thoughts - yanno, this is my favorite part of the week, as far as blogging goes. I get to ramble on about nothing really, and people pretend (my fantastic 23 followers) to show interest... And some even comment! It does wonders for the stuckinthehousealldayandallnight EGO and I'm perfectly comfortable rambling. It's a "forte" of mine. (Gettin all fancy on ya, bet you didn't see that one coming!)



I'm going to admit that I've been keeping a RTT note pad. Ok, it's not really a notepad per say, but I do scribble notes and jot down thoughts on the back of an envelope. Hell, I have a slew of blog envelopes, one for each day of the week. I've decided to pick a new bill for each day of each week to draw all over and scribble on. Makes me feel better about paying the bill that's inside in some sort of way. Plus, this way I've always got fresh ideas. These are pretty much in chronological order, as they really happened, because you won't find any lies and false shit here folks. Because that's.how.I.roll.





Last week Andy, feeling sorry for me because I couldn't seem to get rid of that hacking, nagging cough, brought me home a surprise. Colloidal Silver Classic. He tells me to take a teaspoon of this liquid metal and put it under my tongue for 1 minute, then swallow. I'm not sure if it was mind over matter or what, but the next morning I felt FANTASTIC! I was even in a good mood, and mornings and I usually don't get along very well. Andy of course thought it would be a neat experiment... I would have to bow down to his feet because HE brought me the two week long lougie-hacking remedy, not to mention he thought I'd be shittin' nickles. He only wanted his initial $21 investment back for the tiny 4 oz bottle. I completely understand.




I'm back to work right? Kinda. Well, I'm part-time, mostly because the great doctors at one of our local ER's (the one where I once made sooooo much money it hurt people's feelings) figured out that instead of spending hundreds of thousands of dollars a year on a transcription service, they could just invest in a point-and-click piece of shit software and completely ruin my life. So now I'm stuck doing stupid discharge summaries and transplant institute reports. Bleh! Anyway... I got my first paycheck since I had been back and it was a measly $200. WTF man! I think I got ripped off or something. Surely the account lady screwed up. Surely.


Andy occasionally looks at my blog at work, on lunch of course, because he wouldn't want folks to think that their hard earned tax dollars are going to a plethora of bookmarked pages for his enjoyment. He looked at one entry I made last week and tried to be sneaky and comment. Bahahahahahaha, it didn't take because he is not a blogger. I told him you have to have special woman powers and go through an excruciatingly painful interview by a panel of Xanax-free, hormonal women to be able to post. Then I added him as an author to this blog. Warning: Watch out for random Andy thoughts. He might sneak in here.


This weekend, I think it was Sunday evening, Andy and I were sitting in front of the boob tube and watched One Missed Call. It's supposed to be a scary movie, but it's pretty stupid. Basically, someone dies and right after they die, a "contact" of theirs from their cell phone is called from a future date and leaves a scary message, indicating their death is next. Right in the middle of the movie, and the futuristic death calls, my cell phone goes off. It's a text. Needless to say, we were a bit freaked out. AND it just happens to be one of my life long best friends, who Andy isn't that fond of. I should be dead by 7 pm today, according to the storyline.

I'm not sure if many of you are "blended families" or not. Yanno, step kids kind of blended. We are. And every time the oldest, my bio kid, the 15 y/o, goes to her dad's for the weekend and I have to endure the 2-hour long convo about how she hates her step-mom upon her return. She doesn't really hate her. She just listens to her older sisters over there bitch about her, so naturally, she thinks the step-mom is evil. I try to even the playing field and stand up for the step-mom, even though I'm secretly laughing inside... because I'm better... at everything... but for the sake of argument (with bio-dad) and respect for their household (pfffft, as if), I do what I can. One thing I'm particularly happy about is that she (the step-mom) can't cook. The 15y/o, Nisha, hates her step-mom's cooking. I love it when she comes home and tells me how horrible her food is. But this weekend was different. Nisha comes home and tells me she had the most fantastic salad ever. "It was the best salad of my life mama!" Ex-ca-use ME! Biting back my sharp tongue and cynical look, I listened and smiled. "She puts strawberries in her salads mama!" Whatever. Sounds gross to me. And my salads are WAY BETTER!

I'm completely addicted to Sims 2. If you don't know anything about it, don't look it up. It's dangerous. I played that game from 2 pm yesterday until 2 am. TWELVE FREAKIN HOURS! I declared it a left-over night and never stepped away from the laptop screen (except for the 30 second bathroom trips). In any event, I managed to virtually kill Andy and I (because I created us as characters). We started out with no kids, he knocked me up twice and we raised them. Then all of a sudden, out of no where, I can't get us to get out of bed. We aren't doing naughty things in there either. Sickos! We are just sleeping. And we can't get up. Nothing I click on works. I think my Sim actually pee'd the bed. I killed us. So then Nisha wanted to play and I helped her create a Sim. Because she's just a beginner, she did it all wrong, and now all her Sim wants to do is make babies. Ack! I'm teaching the kid, the hormonal teenager, how to MAKE BABIES! Anyway... at 2 am, everyone in our REAL house is asleep (at least I thought they were) Andy comes down the hall, takes one look at me all snuggled up on the couch, eyes beet red and plastered to that screen and says, "Ok, you are officially a loser." Sims 3 comes out in June. I need rehab.

And finally, yanno how when a kid pukes sometimes it just flies out of their mouth and ends up 4 feet away. I always wondered how that happened. Like, what mechanism in their throat and mouth causes them to shoot puke that far away. I was awestruck. Until today. I'm minding my own business in the kitchen, getting Big K some apple juice, and having a normal morning. I have another one of those damn coughing fits and all of a sudden, out of flipping no where, I hurl! And not just puke a little bit in my mouth kind of hurl, where I can cover my mouth and charge to the bathroom toilet before spewing. This was pro-jec-tile! I turned my head just in time for the monsoon of Pepsi to come rushing out of my throat! It hit the back of my top teeth, which somehow guided it right into the kitchen trash can. It was like when you turn on the faucet and magically a steady flow of water comes flying out. Let me tell you, there is no wretching and body curling like with normal puke. This was just a steady, even flow of regurg-Pepsi. Like at the fountain drink station at 7-Eleven. Totally gross. All I could do was stand there for a few seconds to process. I.just.puked.a.tsunami. Then of course I took out the trash and headed to the bathroom to brush my teeth. Yuck! On the positive side, there was no acid taste, like something was eating the enamel right off my teeth.

Ok, your turn. Go on over to Keely's at The UnMom, snag the button, hook up with Mr. Linky and post your RTT. I'll be back later to make sure you have done it.

And NO... I'm not going to play Sims. I'm doing homework. Nosey.

RTT: Tantrums & Big Mama Bras

Go check out The UnMom and Baby Boogers and play along. Mr. Linky is waiting...

It seems all my entries are random as of late. I just can't seem to wrap my head around one single thought long enough to write about it.

I've realized the backspace key is the most often used key on my keyboard.

I wish I could communicate better. I threw a tantrum last night, like a 2-year-old, and my poor Andy caught the brunt of it. We snuggled later, but I hate that I can't just say what I mean when I mean it, instead of waiting until I blow up about stupid things.

Andy's new promotion starts July 1. I'm so proud of him! He transferred to headquarters shortly after we got together and said there was more opportunity for advancement there, plus he could mingle with the big-wigs. I guess he was right. He really is a great employee, knows his stuff and isn't afraid to be right. I love that about him. He is the "go to" man of sorts around there and of course it swells his head, but he totally deserves it.

Someone remind me... make a neuro appt for the 15 y/o! Jeeze, you'd think one simple phone call during the day wouldn't be that hard to remember! I've got to get this appt scheduled so I'm not the mom calling in a month from now saying that my kid doesn't have enough medicine to last until her next appt. Seriously, they write the Rx for 6 months worth and I wait until the very last minute to make an appointment. It's not like she's just taking Motrin yanno lol.

Speaking of the neuro, we are coming up on the 3rd year anniversary of the 15-year-olds brain surgeries. I'm so proud of her. She really has come a long way. I have experienced nothing scarier in my life than sending my child off to a secret room to have part of her brain removed while I'm just directed out to some room with a bunch of other scared people to wait it out. I held it together until her dad and I had just said our "goodbyes" and were heading down that never ending, stark white hallway to the waiting room. I lost it. Nearly fell to the ground bawling like a baby. And then having to repeat that scene 2 more times within a matter of days. Wow! Talk about patience, prayer and the strength of a family.

Now that postop child is looking forward to a drivers license. Eek! Jeeze I'm old. I remember like it was yesterday when she was 4 and bringing me the brush and pretty pink bows saying, "Mama, fix my hurr." She only wanted to be the prettiest girl playing in the mud.

We were over at Andy's mom's yesterday for her birthday celebration with the rest of the enormous family. Seriously, her 5 kids were there, with their kids, and their kids' kids. All jam packed into the front room of Gma's house. Good times! I love that their family is close-knit. I didn't really have that with my family... hell, I'm the only sucka left in Oklahoma from my family. They all tricked my mom and I into moving out to Oklahoma from sunshiney California... and by the time I was out of high school, most all of them had relocated. Now I'm ridin' solo out there. But to tell the truth, there isn't any other place I'd rather be. I love my life here.

Goal for today is to get my homework done and get the floors done in the house. Surely I can manage that.

I get a package in the mail last week addressed TO my mama, who lives in Texas. Our names are similar, but two completely different zip codes in two different states. Odd. I'm confused, but then I remembered that my mama is back in the online shopping game and thought maybe she sent me something. She's been known to just send "blessings" every now and again out of the blue. It's from A Woman Within. I have no clue, so I tear open the package. Inside there's a bunch of magazines, an order form, and another package. I don't bother to look at the magazines because DUH, there's something else to rip open. ACK! Inside I find a big mama bra... 44D. The kind with four snaps in the back on a 3-inch wide strap. The Fort Knox kind of bra that holds big mama boulders, not boobies. What tha.....this CAN'T be for me! Apparently, our addresses somehow got crossed and it came here. Boo! I wanted a surprise. Instead I get this:

Ok, I'll shut up now. That's enough random thoughts for the moment. I'm sure though, in the midst of diligently doing my homework, I'll find some reason to get back on the computer and end up here again before the day it done.

Random Tuesday

Here we are again, another Tuesday... join in at The UnMom for more Random Tuesday Thoughts!

I didn't post yesterday because I was knee deep in snot and homework.

I'm all hyped up on Mucinex, Sudafed and Pepsi. No coffee squirts this morning, but geeze, how much snot do I have to cough up before my lungs no longer feel like bowling balls???

One of my favorite bloggy friends, Lana, at The Kids Did WHAT?! tagged me for "8 Things" and broke my tag cherry. I couldn't be more proud. Go check out her blog, she's hilarious! (I promise Lana, I'll post on that one later today)

I found my new May edition of Better Homes and Gardens in the bathroom this weekend. When I asked WHY I hadn't even seen the magazine yet, my lovely Andy admitted he was reading it. Go Martha!

The supper menu for this weekend went exacty as planned! Too excited about that. I don't have pictures of anything except Friday night...

They turned out really well, tasted super yum and the kids all helped. We made a ton of them!

The Holocaust class is over and WHEW! I made it! I had to do TWO oral presentations last night in class and I just knew something bad was going to happen, especially considering my fear of speaking in front of people. Luckily though, I didn't fall down, trip over a hair in the carpet on the way to the podium, or pass out from anxiety. I think I made an A in that class YIPPEE!

Andy stayed home from work yesterday b/c I've been battling this stupid URI and had the babies to take care of during the day, along with my homework that I've been putting off for a week. I love him so much! He played hookie for me!

We also finished marking off the garden beds yesterday and I got some of my stuff transplanted. Looks like a real garden now!

Our friend Chris and his wife Blair were over for Sunday dinner. It was really good spending time with them, and they didn't even make THAT much fun of me for making my own salsa... and canning it lol. In fact, I sent a jar home with them. It made me feel super good that Chris and Andy were joking about sending Blair over to me for a week so I could train her lol. Apparently, she isn't really domesticated. In fact, we sent Chris home with a huge container of leftovers from the enchiladas and bbq beef biscuit basket things so he would have something for lunch at work the following week. He has been working out of town lately and only comes home about once a week and the weekends. I don't think he was too excited about another week of Hungry Man dinners.

I've said it before and I'll say it again.... it feels SO good not being shacked up with a married man! Thank God that divorce is finally OVERRRRR!

Sims 3 comes out in June! My girl Julie (who is just as addicted as I am, maybe even moreso) and I have decided to go halvsies on it and share. This one is supposed to have way more cool stuff to build the houses with and many more attitudes on the Sims characters.

Wednesday night I have class again. What the hell man! Who goes to school TWO nights a week? Pffft! This starts the 5-week session for Intro to Fine Arts. Can I just say that I'm not looking forward to studying statues of naked dudes posing all fancy with their dongs hanging out. Really... what am I supposed to get from this class?

The 15 y/o was a total butthead this morning and even told Andy on her way to school that he needed to "put mama in check". Ex-ca-use me! Just wait til that little brat comes home from school and I chase her down the street with a wooden spoon. Who's gonna be put in check then!?!?! Huh! Huh!

I was really looking forward to my sissy coming to visit at the end of May, until today, when I realized my house is a pit, I haven't finished unpacking from when we moved into this house in January, my garage is a mess, the livingroom isn't decorated yet, and I'll have to get EVERYTHING done before she shows up. Normally, I would just leave it alone and she would Feng-Shui my whole house for me, cuz she's a control freak and I'm just lazy, but she'll be accompanied by her Dick and we won't have the time. Bleh!

Ok, I'm over it. I've got to get some work done and apparently, the screaming kids in the other room need some attention.