I suck at coming up with catchy titles. Deal with it. I've just got a quick thing to share. Andy is the greatest man in the whole wide world and I love him to pieces.
Monday I sprained my wrist somehow and it's been a little difficult getting things done around here. Not to mention the children were evil all day long and I couldn't get squat done. I was near suicidal by the time Andy got home from work. He told me not to worry about a thing and he was going to take care of it. And let me tell you... HE DID! He cleaned the kitchen, including sweeping and moping the floor, did laundry, handled the kids, fed them dinner and everything.
I felt guilty b/c after dinner the Andi K, the 4 y/o, looks up at me and says, "I like your cooking." Let me break that down for you in 4 y/o lingo: that meant she wasn't happy with being fed leftovers and wished I would have cooked something. But I promised a good dinner the next night and she was happy with that.
Then Tuesday, he's at work and tells me he is going to come home and give everyone pedicures. Say what! I have a serious foot phobia, but we got this new foot bath thingy (free on craigslist in our dumpster diving episode... read about it here). Nonetheless, I told him I'd let him touch my feet. I actually kinda doubted that he'd follow through once he got home, especially since he took care of everything the night before so I could climb down the hysterical wall of suicidality I created.
This man is so beautiful! We go to Walgreens and he tells me to pick some smelly salts for the foot tub. My eyes go straight for a complete pedicure set, which is twice as much as the salts alone, and I bat my eyes and ask, "Can I get this one? It's the whole set!" His reply, "Whatever you want." Who wouldn't love that!?!?!?! Whatever I want! Yuppers, he's a keeper. As we head up to the register he stops by the nail polish. Cute huh? He picks out a really nice pink that all the girls' toesies will adorn. When is the last time YOUR man picked out nail polish for you?
I can't wait to be Mrs. Andy!
Showing posts with label Andy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Andy. Show all posts
Wednesday, July 1, 2009
Wednesday, May 6, 2009
American Idol and Andy's Philosophy
Two things today. They aren't connected. He doesn't have a philosophy on American Idol, other than thinking Adam really didn't make it into the bottom three last week and that stunt was just pulled for ratings. Pffft, he did so. I saw him. In the bottom three. With my own eyes! And that leaves Danny as the only one who hasn't been in the bottom three, at least until tonight.
American Idol recap -
I liked the duet thingy they did last night. But does that mean that AI just can't find any musical rock celebrities to perform that they have to make the contestants do duets? In any event, I was passed out on the couch when I heard Adam screaming his song and woke up. I caught the tail end of it. I'm sure it was amazing and the world ooh'd and ahh'd over his performance, but I'm still not going to go back and watch it. I get it. He's good. He's fantastic. He's a natural.
Allison. Poor Allison. I thought she was really going to rock the house last night. Joplin is definitely the artist choice for her, but the song choice wasn't hot. I still love her and I think she has come so very far in her time on AI. Raw talent. And I love that her new hair seems to have given her more confidence.
Kris. I love that face distortion he makes when he sings, his jaw moved completely over to the right side of his face. I'm so glad he got it back. I think Danny or someone really made fun of him for doing that, but it's his trademark, just like Adam wears more makeup than all the women in my family combined... it's him. It's what he does. I don't think he did so hot last night and he'll probably be the one going home tonight. But I adore that sexy, sweet face of his, that great voice of his and I know he'll do great things with his career.
Danny. I heart him. He's got that gruff sexy voice that gives me chills when he sings. That last note wasn't a great one, but I think the duet with him and Kris will keep him in the game. Guess we'll find out if going outside the box helped him or put him out of the game tonight.
As a side note... last week when Danny and Allison had their little food fight... am I the only one who thought they were really friendly? Maybe I just have a sick and twisted mind, but Danny has got to be super lonely, still mourning the death of his wife, and Allison, a hot girl with a mad voice, and the ONLY female in that house??? I realize she's only 17 and he's a grown man, but c'mon, there was something more than just a food fight going on there.
Now for Andy's Philosophy... I'm getting a bit serious here. Watch out.
I mentioned Andy's idea that most people are bad investments here, and therefore he cannot be friends with them. That was a bit harsh so I thought I'd ellaborate on this philosophy of his.
Andy thinks of people/potential friends as investments, in a very analytical type of way. He thinks that if a potential friend sucks more life out of you than they give you, they are bad investments. He believes that if people bring drama to your life, they aren't worthy of your friendship. It's very cut and dry here. If he meet someone who seems nice on the outside, but their life is in turmoil and all they do is "need", he will not waste his precious time on them. Don't get me wrong, he won't be disrespectful or tell that person what a loser they are (unless they ask for his advice and then certainly he will be very blunt); he just won't allow that person in his circle. Think about it. You invest time, money and emotional ties with friends. If they don't reciprocate in a positive manner, and your initial investment is used up with nothing to show for it, how can they be deemed a good investment?
My philosophy on friends is way different. I have friends from all walks of life. I'm not a people person really, but I find life interesting, and everyone has their ups and downs. I wasn't going to judge these people because their lives were different than mine, and they didn't judge me. I was the "mama" figure to most of them and when something horrible would happen they would flock to my door. I thought I needed them as much as they needed me. Then Andy came along and showed me exactly how some of these people were sucking the life out of me and I was allowing them to hold me back. I was constantly surrounded by gossip and who is doing what and with whom, so much so that I was forgetting all about the greatness my own life could hold.
Andy's philosophy started to make sense to me, but I wasn't ready to fully commit to that idea.
One particular friend of mine hit rock bottom and needed a place to stay. To sum it up, she was a very close friend, I offered our home without speaking to Andy first, he just warned me that this decision would bite me in the ass. It did. Hard. She once was very productive and had all her ducks in a row. I just thought she just needed someone to believe in her... no job, no car, no place to stay, completely boy crazy, and very few friends who would put up with her. I, being the rescuer and humanitarian, thought I could fix her. At first, it was working out fine. I was training her to do transcription, she was helping me with the kids during the day, sending out resumes and going on job interviews. Then she broke the rules. She went to darts one night, in my car, and by the time Andy got up for work the next morning, my car wasn't home. This turned into a huge fiasco. Andy called a friend (at 5:30 am) who called another friend who tracked her down. By 6:30 we found out she apparently drank too much and in her hormonal, drunken, needy, state of mind she went over to a dude's house and stayed the night. I tripped out on her. Not only was my man, the one who is paying the bills in the house that she is currently living in, late for work, but she had the carseats for Monkey Boy and Baby Love in my car. Needless to say, I was livid. Forced to keep my cool because the kids were there, I ushered my friend in the house and sent my man and the kids on their way, 30 minutes late.
In my life prior to Andy, I would have just thanked my lucky stars that she didn't drive my car while drunk and that she was okay. I never would have seen the predicament that she caused for my family. I would have been pissed, but I would have calmed down much faster and been able to deal with her. This time her stunt was different. And believe me, there have been some stupid stunts in the past, but nothing of this magnitude that directly involved me.
I had to put my big girl panties on and make a decision. Andy said he would handle it for me and talk to my friend (and by talk he meant put her out). As much as I wanted him to be the bad guy in this one, I decided it was my responsibility since I was the one who offered her a place to stay. I sat her down and told her... "Bottom line, you've got to find somewhere else to live." She cried, apologized, cried some more and asked, "Will you still be my friend?" Of course I would. I didn't hate her. I just knew, at that moment, she was a bad investment.
I love this girl. We have been there for each other through thick and thin for years now, and it's hard to distance yourself from people you care about. But Andy is right. He's got his head on straight about investments and friends. When they begin to cause turmoil in your backyard, it's time to cut the ties. It took me a while to wrap my head around this philosophy of his, but after I did, I was amazed at how drama-free, calm and happy my life was turning out to be. I pushed this friend out of my backyard and handed her off to her family. I still love her very much. She hit rock bottom shortly after that incident and has since started rebuilding her life. She's got a long road ahead of her, but I'm so proud of her. We talk, occasionally. We see each other, occasionally. But I definitely am still guarded regarding how close I can be to her.
People are all different. But ultimately, we are the ones who make the final decisions on who and what we allow in our lives, how close we allow them to get, and how much control of our lives we allow them to have. I was never really surrounded by a close family growing up. My family caused pain, therefore, my needs for connection with people were filled with friends, pre-Andy. Now, my need to be needed is filled by Andy and the kids. My family needs me. And my friends/associates/investments are kept at a safe distance. I still make time for my friends, love and cherish them all, but they definitely take a back burner to my family now. It's a great feeling.
American Idol recap -
I liked the duet thingy they did last night. But does that mean that AI just can't find any musical rock celebrities to perform that they have to make the contestants do duets? In any event, I was passed out on the couch when I heard Adam screaming his song and woke up. I caught the tail end of it. I'm sure it was amazing and the world ooh'd and ahh'd over his performance, but I'm still not going to go back and watch it. I get it. He's good. He's fantastic. He's a natural.
Allison. Poor Allison. I thought she was really going to rock the house last night. Joplin is definitely the artist choice for her, but the song choice wasn't hot. I still love her and I think she has come so very far in her time on AI. Raw talent. And I love that her new hair seems to have given her more confidence.
Kris. I love that face distortion he makes when he sings, his jaw moved completely over to the right side of his face. I'm so glad he got it back. I think Danny or someone really made fun of him for doing that, but it's his trademark, just like Adam wears more makeup than all the women in my family combined... it's him. It's what he does. I don't think he did so hot last night and he'll probably be the one going home tonight. But I adore that sexy, sweet face of his, that great voice of his and I know he'll do great things with his career.
Danny. I heart him. He's got that gruff sexy voice that gives me chills when he sings. That last note wasn't a great one, but I think the duet with him and Kris will keep him in the game. Guess we'll find out if going outside the box helped him or put him out of the game tonight.
As a side note... last week when Danny and Allison had their little food fight... am I the only one who thought they were really friendly? Maybe I just have a sick and twisted mind, but Danny has got to be super lonely, still mourning the death of his wife, and Allison, a hot girl with a mad voice, and the ONLY female in that house??? I realize she's only 17 and he's a grown man, but c'mon, there was something more than just a food fight going on there.
Now for Andy's Philosophy... I'm getting a bit serious here. Watch out.
I mentioned Andy's idea that most people are bad investments here, and therefore he cannot be friends with them. That was a bit harsh so I thought I'd ellaborate on this philosophy of his.
Andy thinks of people/potential friends as investments, in a very analytical type of way. He thinks that if a potential friend sucks more life out of you than they give you, they are bad investments. He believes that if people bring drama to your life, they aren't worthy of your friendship. It's very cut and dry here. If he meet someone who seems nice on the outside, but their life is in turmoil and all they do is "need", he will not waste his precious time on them. Don't get me wrong, he won't be disrespectful or tell that person what a loser they are (unless they ask for his advice and then certainly he will be very blunt); he just won't allow that person in his circle. Think about it. You invest time, money and emotional ties with friends. If they don't reciprocate in a positive manner, and your initial investment is used up with nothing to show for it, how can they be deemed a good investment?
My philosophy on friends is way different. I have friends from all walks of life. I'm not a people person really, but I find life interesting, and everyone has their ups and downs. I wasn't going to judge these people because their lives were different than mine, and they didn't judge me. I was the "mama" figure to most of them and when something horrible would happen they would flock to my door. I thought I needed them as much as they needed me. Then Andy came along and showed me exactly how some of these people were sucking the life out of me and I was allowing them to hold me back. I was constantly surrounded by gossip and who is doing what and with whom, so much so that I was forgetting all about the greatness my own life could hold.
Andy's philosophy started to make sense to me, but I wasn't ready to fully commit to that idea.
One particular friend of mine hit rock bottom and needed a place to stay. To sum it up, she was a very close friend, I offered our home without speaking to Andy first, he just warned me that this decision would bite me in the ass. It did. Hard. She once was very productive and had all her ducks in a row. I just thought she just needed someone to believe in her... no job, no car, no place to stay, completely boy crazy, and very few friends who would put up with her. I, being the rescuer and humanitarian, thought I could fix her. At first, it was working out fine. I was training her to do transcription, she was helping me with the kids during the day, sending out resumes and going on job interviews. Then she broke the rules. She went to darts one night, in my car, and by the time Andy got up for work the next morning, my car wasn't home. This turned into a huge fiasco. Andy called a friend (at 5:30 am) who called another friend who tracked her down. By 6:30 we found out she apparently drank too much and in her hormonal, drunken, needy, state of mind she went over to a dude's house and stayed the night. I tripped out on her. Not only was my man, the one who is paying the bills in the house that she is currently living in, late for work, but she had the carseats for Monkey Boy and Baby Love in my car. Needless to say, I was livid. Forced to keep my cool because the kids were there, I ushered my friend in the house and sent my man and the kids on their way, 30 minutes late.
In my life prior to Andy, I would have just thanked my lucky stars that she didn't drive my car while drunk and that she was okay. I never would have seen the predicament that she caused for my family. I would have been pissed, but I would have calmed down much faster and been able to deal with her. This time her stunt was different. And believe me, there have been some stupid stunts in the past, but nothing of this magnitude that directly involved me.
I had to put my big girl panties on and make a decision. Andy said he would handle it for me and talk to my friend (and by talk he meant put her out). As much as I wanted him to be the bad guy in this one, I decided it was my responsibility since I was the one who offered her a place to stay. I sat her down and told her... "Bottom line, you've got to find somewhere else to live." She cried, apologized, cried some more and asked, "Will you still be my friend?" Of course I would. I didn't hate her. I just knew, at that moment, she was a bad investment.
I love this girl. We have been there for each other through thick and thin for years now, and it's hard to distance yourself from people you care about. But Andy is right. He's got his head on straight about investments and friends. When they begin to cause turmoil in your backyard, it's time to cut the ties. It took me a while to wrap my head around this philosophy of his, but after I did, I was amazed at how drama-free, calm and happy my life was turning out to be. I pushed this friend out of my backyard and handed her off to her family. I still love her very much. She hit rock bottom shortly after that incident and has since started rebuilding her life. She's got a long road ahead of her, but I'm so proud of her. We talk, occasionally. We see each other, occasionally. But I definitely am still guarded regarding how close I can be to her.
People are all different. But ultimately, we are the ones who make the final decisions on who and what we allow in our lives, how close we allow them to get, and how much control of our lives we allow them to have. I was never really surrounded by a close family growing up. My family caused pain, therefore, my needs for connection with people were filled with friends, pre-Andy. Now, my need to be needed is filled by Andy and the kids. My family needs me. And my friends/associates/investments are kept at a safe distance. I still make time for my friends, love and cherish them all, but they definitely take a back burner to my family now. It's a great feeling.
Thursday, April 16, 2009
The Ex-Wife: The Saga Continues
History: I wasn't Andy's first.*Gasp* He wasn't my first.*Double gasp*
He married a lovely woman and has three kids with said lovely woman. I married ajackass lovely man and created one spawn by said lovely man.
They are in the process of a joint-custody divorce (which will be filed today YAY) and we've been living in sin for almost a year. Don't judge me dammit. He was already long gone from their relationship when I found him and stalked him and made him mine... with the help of several shots of Patron and a few make-out sessions in the truck after leaving the dart bar. I know, what a slut!
Anyhoo - down to the story. They have a very amicable relationship, of which I am completely jealous because my ex and I aren't on the greatest of terms. All in all, they have the best interest of the kids at heart and I think it's admirable that they don't mix their current lives and plans with the pain of divorce. Although, neither of them seem to be in much pain about this whole ordeal. Odd.
I've never really had an issue with this lovely woman. Ever. She's been kind to me and even her family seems to like me. I might even like her if she weren't the ex-wife lol. I, being a sceptical woman, think there is something behind the scenes going on. Women tend to judge other women, whether we admit it or not. Size each other up type of thing. I can't help but think they are only being soooo nice to get the scoop in our household and see what they can gossip about. I don't give them any fuel... whatever their intentions may be. And it could be they have no intentions are just nice people.
Then... Easter weekend happened and I got my very first dose of ex-wife BS. C'mon, it's been over a year that Andy and I have been together, so in her defense... it's about time she screwed up.
We were going over to Andy's moms house on Saturday b/c rain was in the forecast for Sunday. His mom has a school across the street from her house so it was a great place to hide eggs for the billion and one kids, grandkids, nieces, nephews, great nieces, great nephews and all the in-laws... ok you get the pic. Big Family!
Lovely ex-wife called at about 10:30 that morning wondering what time we were going to pick up the kids. He tells her between 2 and 2:30 as the Easter celebration started promptly at 3. She's notified. Agrees. All seems well.
We leave the house, Nisha, Andy and I, all rockin' the mini and ready to mingle with the fam. It's 2:15. We call said lovely ex-wife to let her know we are on the way. Common courtesy. Really, it's more of a "have the kids ready" type call so we aren't sitting there at her house (again) waiting for the kids to get shoes on, hair done, etc.
Said lovely ex-wife says they aren't at home. In fact, they are at a damn birthday party for a neighbor/friend of the oldest child, DD. Ex-ca-use me?!?! (Insert grumpy face emoticon here)
Ok, don't panic. He tells her firmly to have the kids at his mom's at 3. All is well again.
We arrive at his mom's chillin with the folks, having a good time with kids chomping at the bit to hunt Easter eggs. Three o'clock rolls around and we are still short THREE KIDS! Where in the hell are my kids?!?! (I know they aren't MY kids but they are MY kids, ya feel me?)
He calls. They are still at that damn party. Ok... now here's where I get pissed. Really pissed. That's rude. That's completely rude and unacceptable. We arranged to have the kids, gave her plenty of notice and even let her have Easter Sunday all to herself with the kids. That's TOTAL BS!
Andy calls her to rip her a new one and I don't even remember their conversation (believe me I tried to eavesdrop) because I was so damn mad. We have 20 kids all standing at the front door, whose parents brought them there ON TIME, for this flippin Easter egg hunt and WE are the hold up.... WE don't have our kids. Grrrr!
She shows up at about 3:15 all apologetic and shit. Whatever lovely ex-wife. What-the-eff-ever! He gets the kids, tells her all about how uncool that was and we proceeded with our day.
Good enough. I'm over it. We have the kids and the celebration begins.
Thennnnnnn, adding insult to injury, when it's time to take the kids home.... LOVELY EX-WIFE isn't in a place where she can receive the kids (because somehow it was our duty to return them to her place) and she tells us to drop them off at her sister's house. Uhhh...say what? I have met said sister and I don't agree with her lifestyle, especially when my kids are involved. Specifically, I remember picking up my beautiful babies from her house one afternoon at 1-ish and they all had red and green popsicle face and dear uncle of theirs informs me that they haven't had breakfast... just popsicles! Grrrrrrrr! Feed my babies you moron! (Insert really grumpy face emoticon here)
We ended up having a lovely day with the kiddo's and pretended like we didn't want to stab lovely ex-wife in the throat... with a knife. How morbid. I know. But when everything has gone exceptionally well for over a year, and then BAM we get his with ex-wife's complete disregard for our plans... it really, really hit me.
Enough ranting. Just writing about it pissed me off all over again!
**Disclaimer: If any of your family, or yourself, lovely ex-wife have access to my blog, please ignore my rant. I certainly don't want to stir up unnecessary feelings, but you REALLY pissed me off that day. Thank you in advance. (Insert smiley face emoticon here)
He married a lovely woman and has three kids with said lovely woman. I married a
They are in the process of a joint-custody divorce (which will be filed today YAY) and we've been living in sin for almost a year. Don't judge me dammit. He was already long gone from their relationship when I found him and stalked him and made him mine... with the help of several shots of Patron and a few make-out sessions in the truck after leaving the dart bar. I know, what a slut!
Anyhoo - down to the story. They have a very amicable relationship, of which I am completely jealous because my ex and I aren't on the greatest of terms. All in all, they have the best interest of the kids at heart and I think it's admirable that they don't mix their current lives and plans with the pain of divorce. Although, neither of them seem to be in much pain about this whole ordeal. Odd.
I've never really had an issue with this lovely woman. Ever. She's been kind to me and even her family seems to like me. I might even like her if she weren't the ex-wife lol. I, being a sceptical woman, think there is something behind the scenes going on. Women tend to judge other women, whether we admit it or not. Size each other up type of thing. I can't help but think they are only being soooo nice to get the scoop in our household and see what they can gossip about. I don't give them any fuel... whatever their intentions may be. And it could be they have no intentions are just nice people.
Then... Easter weekend happened and I got my very first dose of ex-wife BS. C'mon, it's been over a year that Andy and I have been together, so in her defense... it's about time she screwed up.
We were going over to Andy's moms house on Saturday b/c rain was in the forecast for Sunday. His mom has a school across the street from her house so it was a great place to hide eggs for the billion and one kids, grandkids, nieces, nephews, great nieces, great nephews and all the in-laws... ok you get the pic. Big Family!
Lovely ex-wife called at about 10:30 that morning wondering what time we were going to pick up the kids. He tells her between 2 and 2:30 as the Easter celebration started promptly at 3. She's notified. Agrees. All seems well.
We leave the house, Nisha, Andy and I, all rockin' the mini and ready to mingle with the fam. It's 2:15. We call said lovely ex-wife to let her know we are on the way. Common courtesy. Really, it's more of a "have the kids ready" type call so we aren't sitting there at her house (again) waiting for the kids to get shoes on, hair done, etc.
Said lovely ex-wife says they aren't at home. In fact, they are at a damn birthday party for a neighbor/friend of the oldest child, DD. Ex-ca-use me?!?! (Insert grumpy face emoticon here)
Ok, don't panic. He tells her firmly to have the kids at his mom's at 3. All is well again.
We arrive at his mom's chillin with the folks, having a good time with kids chomping at the bit to hunt Easter eggs. Three o'clock rolls around and we are still short THREE KIDS! Where in the hell are my kids?!?! (I know they aren't MY kids but they are MY kids, ya feel me?)
He calls. They are still at that damn party. Ok... now here's where I get pissed. Really pissed. That's rude. That's completely rude and unacceptable. We arranged to have the kids, gave her plenty of notice and even let her have Easter Sunday all to herself with the kids. That's TOTAL BS!
Andy calls her to rip her a new one and I don't even remember their conversation (believe me I tried to eavesdrop) because I was so damn mad. We have 20 kids all standing at the front door, whose parents brought them there ON TIME, for this flippin Easter egg hunt and WE are the hold up.... WE don't have our kids. Grrrr!
She shows up at about 3:15 all apologetic and shit. Whatever lovely ex-wife. What-the-eff-ever! He gets the kids, tells her all about how uncool that was and we proceeded with our day.
Good enough. I'm over it. We have the kids and the celebration begins.
Thennnnnnn, adding insult to injury, when it's time to take the kids home.... LOVELY EX-WIFE isn't in a place where she can receive the kids (because somehow it was our duty to return them to her place) and she tells us to drop them off at her sister's house. Uhhh...say what? I have met said sister and I don't agree with her lifestyle, especially when my kids are involved. Specifically, I remember picking up my beautiful babies from her house one afternoon at 1-ish and they all had red and green popsicle face and dear uncle of theirs informs me that they haven't had breakfast... just popsicles! Grrrrrrrr! Feed my babies you moron! (Insert really grumpy face emoticon here)
We ended up having a lovely day with the kiddo's and pretended like we didn't want to stab lovely ex-wife in the throat... with a knife. How morbid. I know. But when everything has gone exceptionally well for over a year, and then BAM we get his with ex-wife's complete disregard for our plans... it really, really hit me.
Enough ranting. Just writing about it pissed me off all over again!
**Disclaimer: If any of your family, or yourself, lovely ex-wife have access to my blog, please ignore my rant. I certainly don't want to stir up unnecessary feelings, but you REALLY pissed me off that day. Thank you in advance. (Insert smiley face emoticon here)
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
The Ex-Wife Saga Begins: I DONT LIKE MUSHROOMS
This is a post from a blog I wrote many moons ago (ok it was last year) in a group I've been a member of for years. I am posting here to give some history on the lovely ex-wife. Stay tuned for more about said lovely ex-wife.
08/15/08 - Ok so Andy and I have been seeing each other for a few months. By this time we have introduced our children to each other and do group things with the kids. Memorial day weekend is coming up and Andy's family has a family reunion out at Canton Lake. I've been invited, but I'm a bit apprehensive because this is a big, very close family. I keep hearing horror stories about how they hate Andy's ex-wife and what big a-holes all the guys can be. My impression was that these folks were pretty old-fashioned roughnecks who liked a hot plate on the table when they got home from work and the little lady would have a boot upside her neck if she didn't comply.
Well, a week before the reunion the "ex" calls Andy and tells him that "her" kids aren't going away with him for the weekend unless she gets to meet me. Immediately Andy goes left of course, because she worded it more as a threat than as a request. Being a woman, a mother and an ex-wife myself, I know what's going through her mind and the real reasons behind this "meeting" she's wanting. We all say it's because we want to know the person who is spending so much time with our kids, when in fact, we want to make sure the new love is fatter and not as pretty as we are. We want to see for ourselves that her thighs jiggle when she walks and she doesn't have that great of an ass. We've just got to see that she's got grey hair or a bad dye job and she wears her pants too tight b/c she thinks she's a lot smaller than she really is. Point blank -- ex's are calculating and have agendas.
After he gives her a few words on threatening him with his kids, Andy approaches me, very carefully, and tells me that the ex wants to meet me. No problem. I saw this coming a mile away. But I've been to this rodeo before and I can tell you this -- I gave her exactly what she was looking for. I'm not a pretentious "plastic" by any means. I showed up at her house and offered nothing but the real me. My hair was in a knot on top of my head, no make-up, worn out flip flops, a faded t-shirt and capris that were at least one size too big. Plus, I won't allow this to be a competition. It's simple -- I have him because you gave him up. Sucka! (ok, so it was a little fun for me)
We were going to stop by her house after she got home from work. The time was all set up. Well, after sitting outside her house for nearly 15 minutes before she showed up, I was a little peeved. Being that I'm chronically late for everything too though, I couldn't admit to being that mad, at least not outloud.
She pulls up in her big fancy suburban and all three kids safely buckled in. We get out of the car and head up the driveway to help her get the kids out of the car. He introduces us. "Katie, Denise... Denise, Katie". I'm not a hand shaker. I don't really like to touch people, especially those I don't know... and she reaches out her hand. Just seems odd to me, two ladies sitting out there shaking hands. Isn't that more of a guy thing? I don't know. Anyway, I take her hand and we nod our heads and put on pretend smiles. It wasn't really an uncomfortable moment, we were just too busy sizing each other up to really be cordial. She's pretty. Very pretty.
We all go into the house and get cozy. In my mind I'm wondering how long I have to be here. I met her. My job is done. Why am I still here? So the ex and I are sitting in the recliners and Andy cops a squat on the floor directly in front of us. The oldest child, then 9, goes to kid with him. The ex is just chatting away, talking to Andy, the kids and even me. I'm off in my own little world watching the youngest play in the diningroom and when I hear the ex and Andy giggling. I look back and apparently the oldest child was looking at her mother and I right in front of her and said, "Ya'll look a lot alike." Huh?!?! Don't get me wrong, I took it as a compliment. She's an attractive lady. It was more uncomfortable for Andy than anyone I think. I'm cracking up on the inside b/c she's Mexican, I'm clearly not. We don't look alike, but admittedly we are shaped similar.
This is taking entirely too long to get to the damn mushrooms. Let me fastforward.
We met, Andy and I left and that was that. One week left until the camping trip and the kids and I are getting very excited. Over the next week I meet more and more of Andy's family. These folks are great! I have no clue what he's talking about when he says they can be a bunch of a-holes. They all have been nothing but nice to me.
The day before we are leaving for Canton Lake, Andy decides to total his truck. Ok, it wasn't his fault and he's lucky I wasn't there. That dingbat kid who drove underneath his truck bed while she was looking at her flippin radio would have had my fist in her throat. By the grace of God, he wasn't hurt, but now we are down a vehicle and all of us can't fit in my little sedan with a ton of camping stuff. It just wasn't going to happen.
Andy calls the ex, tells her he needs to use her suburban. Surprisingly, she agreed. I was pretty much in awe at this point. I didn't want to like her, simply because she's the ex. It's odd. Not only am I taking her place at the family reunion, I'll be taking care of her kids and riding in her suburban. Wow. I'm not sure I would be so gracious in that spot.
Ok, the next morning, we get to the house to pick up the kids. They aren't ready. Here I go. I'm peeved again. They aren't even packed. Really? Are you seriously that bad of a procrastinator? I honestly think the only reason I was pissed was because I knew I was going to have to go back in that house, put on a smile and chill with the ex. Grrrrr!
I sit down while she's running around the house trying to pack things up, brush hair and chase kids.
Let me back up for a second. When Andy told me the ex wanted to meet me, she suggested we all go out to dinner. My reaction? "Bahahahahahahaha! I'll meet the mother of your children but we aren't going to break bread. We aren't going to be best friends and go clubbing together. It just aint gonna happen." My exact words I tell ya!
Ok, Andy is helping her get the kids ready when she decides to go into the kitchen and feed the kids. Seems appropriate, feed the kids before you send them on a roadtrip. I'm thinking cereal, quick and easy. This woman gets out a big ole skillet and decides to scramble up some eggs and make some grits. Not as quick as my idea.
She turns to face me and asks, "Do you like mushrooms?"
Andy is positioned perfectly in the livingroom where I can see him and she can't. He almost dropped to his knees. I was dying inside and he thinks this is the funniest moment in history. He gives me a deer-in-headlights look, waiting for me to open my mouth and respond. I'm not great at hiding my expressions, not at all. And I can't turn to glare at him b/c she's standing right there... looking at me... waiting for my answer.
I'm contemplating on how to appropriately answer this question. Do I like mushrooms? I mean really? What's the big deal? It seems like a simple enough question. So what do I do? I stumble all over my words, like a blithering idiot, trying to find the right thing to say without offending her.
"No. I mean, yes I do. But not right now. I mean, I like them, I'm just not hungry. But thank you." Total lie. I was hungry. I love mushrooms, but not cooked!
She seemed satisfied with my answer and turns back around to cook. My eyes meet Andy's and he's having a hay day with this. He's whispering under his breath about breaking bread with her and how she's cooking me breakfast. I wanted so badly to kick him in the chin and wipe that smirk off his face.
So now, anytime we talk about going over to pick up the kids, he brings up the mushrooms. In fact, he's told his whole family about the time that his ex cooked me breakfast. It wasn't for ME and I didn't want her damn mushrooms!
08/15/08 - Ok so Andy and I have been seeing each other for a few months. By this time we have introduced our children to each other and do group things with the kids. Memorial day weekend is coming up and Andy's family has a family reunion out at Canton Lake. I've been invited, but I'm a bit apprehensive because this is a big, very close family. I keep hearing horror stories about how they hate Andy's ex-wife and what big a-holes all the guys can be. My impression was that these folks were pretty old-fashioned roughnecks who liked a hot plate on the table when they got home from work and the little lady would have a boot upside her neck if she didn't comply.
Well, a week before the reunion the "ex" calls Andy and tells him that "her" kids aren't going away with him for the weekend unless she gets to meet me. Immediately Andy goes left of course, because she worded it more as a threat than as a request. Being a woman, a mother and an ex-wife myself, I know what's going through her mind and the real reasons behind this "meeting" she's wanting. We all say it's because we want to know the person who is spending so much time with our kids, when in fact, we want to make sure the new love is fatter and not as pretty as we are. We want to see for ourselves that her thighs jiggle when she walks and she doesn't have that great of an ass. We've just got to see that she's got grey hair or a bad dye job and she wears her pants too tight b/c she thinks she's a lot smaller than she really is. Point blank -- ex's are calculating and have agendas.
After he gives her a few words on threatening him with his kids, Andy approaches me, very carefully, and tells me that the ex wants to meet me. No problem. I saw this coming a mile away. But I've been to this rodeo before and I can tell you this -- I gave her exactly what she was looking for. I'm not a pretentious "plastic" by any means. I showed up at her house and offered nothing but the real me. My hair was in a knot on top of my head, no make-up, worn out flip flops, a faded t-shirt and capris that were at least one size too big. Plus, I won't allow this to be a competition. It's simple -- I have him because you gave him up. Sucka! (ok, so it was a little fun for me)
We were going to stop by her house after she got home from work. The time was all set up. Well, after sitting outside her house for nearly 15 minutes before she showed up, I was a little peeved. Being that I'm chronically late for everything too though, I couldn't admit to being that mad, at least not outloud.
She pulls up in her big fancy suburban and all three kids safely buckled in. We get out of the car and head up the driveway to help her get the kids out of the car. He introduces us. "Katie, Denise... Denise, Katie". I'm not a hand shaker. I don't really like to touch people, especially those I don't know... and she reaches out her hand. Just seems odd to me, two ladies sitting out there shaking hands. Isn't that more of a guy thing? I don't know. Anyway, I take her hand and we nod our heads and put on pretend smiles. It wasn't really an uncomfortable moment, we were just too busy sizing each other up to really be cordial. She's pretty. Very pretty.
We all go into the house and get cozy. In my mind I'm wondering how long I have to be here. I met her. My job is done. Why am I still here? So the ex and I are sitting in the recliners and Andy cops a squat on the floor directly in front of us. The oldest child, then 9, goes to kid with him. The ex is just chatting away, talking to Andy, the kids and even me. I'm off in my own little world watching the youngest play in the diningroom and when I hear the ex and Andy giggling. I look back and apparently the oldest child was looking at her mother and I right in front of her and said, "Ya'll look a lot alike." Huh?!?! Don't get me wrong, I took it as a compliment. She's an attractive lady. It was more uncomfortable for Andy than anyone I think. I'm cracking up on the inside b/c she's Mexican, I'm clearly not. We don't look alike, but admittedly we are shaped similar.
This is taking entirely too long to get to the damn mushrooms. Let me fastforward.
We met, Andy and I left and that was that. One week left until the camping trip and the kids and I are getting very excited. Over the next week I meet more and more of Andy's family. These folks are great! I have no clue what he's talking about when he says they can be a bunch of a-holes. They all have been nothing but nice to me.
The day before we are leaving for Canton Lake, Andy decides to total his truck. Ok, it wasn't his fault and he's lucky I wasn't there. That dingbat kid who drove underneath his truck bed while she was looking at her flippin radio would have had my fist in her throat. By the grace of God, he wasn't hurt, but now we are down a vehicle and all of us can't fit in my little sedan with a ton of camping stuff. It just wasn't going to happen.
Andy calls the ex, tells her he needs to use her suburban. Surprisingly, she agreed. I was pretty much in awe at this point. I didn't want to like her, simply because she's the ex. It's odd. Not only am I taking her place at the family reunion, I'll be taking care of her kids and riding in her suburban. Wow. I'm not sure I would be so gracious in that spot.
Ok, the next morning, we get to the house to pick up the kids. They aren't ready. Here I go. I'm peeved again. They aren't even packed. Really? Are you seriously that bad of a procrastinator? I honestly think the only reason I was pissed was because I knew I was going to have to go back in that house, put on a smile and chill with the ex. Grrrrr!
I sit down while she's running around the house trying to pack things up, brush hair and chase kids.
Let me back up for a second. When Andy told me the ex wanted to meet me, she suggested we all go out to dinner. My reaction? "Bahahahahahahaha! I'll meet the mother of your children but we aren't going to break bread. We aren't going to be best friends and go clubbing together. It just aint gonna happen." My exact words I tell ya!
Ok, Andy is helping her get the kids ready when she decides to go into the kitchen and feed the kids. Seems appropriate, feed the kids before you send them on a roadtrip. I'm thinking cereal, quick and easy. This woman gets out a big ole skillet and decides to scramble up some eggs and make some grits. Not as quick as my idea.
She turns to face me and asks, "Do you like mushrooms?"
Andy is positioned perfectly in the livingroom where I can see him and she can't. He almost dropped to his knees. I was dying inside and he thinks this is the funniest moment in history. He gives me a deer-in-headlights look, waiting for me to open my mouth and respond. I'm not great at hiding my expressions, not at all. And I can't turn to glare at him b/c she's standing right there... looking at me... waiting for my answer.
I'm contemplating on how to appropriately answer this question. Do I like mushrooms? I mean really? What's the big deal? It seems like a simple enough question. So what do I do? I stumble all over my words, like a blithering idiot, trying to find the right thing to say without offending her.
"No. I mean, yes I do. But not right now. I mean, I like them, I'm just not hungry. But thank you." Total lie. I was hungry. I love mushrooms, but not cooked!
She seemed satisfied with my answer and turns back around to cook. My eyes meet Andy's and he's having a hay day with this. He's whispering under his breath about breaking bread with her and how she's cooking me breakfast. I wanted so badly to kick him in the chin and wipe that smirk off his face.
So now, anytime we talk about going over to pick up the kids, he brings up the mushrooms. In fact, he's told his whole family about the time that his ex cooked me breakfast. It wasn't for ME and I didn't want her damn mushrooms!
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
Spongebob vs. Mr. Woodcock
Here's another dream... or one that I can't remember! Grrr!
So I'm dreaming along one morning, minding my own business, and I feel Andy stirring in bed. I continue with my dream. I remember being partly awake because I made a mental note to remember my dream so I could tell Andy about it later.
Well, Andy wakes me up with morning wood (or Woo-Hoo for the Sims players)... and what else could be a better alarm clock than morning nookie fo'real... and before I roll over with my ready-and-waiting look (yanno the one... nightgown up to my boobs from tossing and turning all night, slobber on the side of my face, eye-goo and hair in knots look) his words were, "I can't do this while you are watching Spongebob!"
Mind you, I fell asleep with the TV on and I'm still asleep, or at least halfway asleep... but I never turn down morning wood. *Gasp*
I roll over, half-way giggle, wipe the slobber from my face and give him the come hither look, trying to bat my eye-booger matted eyes and I'm sure a green fog coming from my mouth.
So, for the last few days I've been trying to remember my flippin dream and the only thing I can remember was the very last scene before my eyes were completely open... Andy about to soar onto the bed, t-shirt on and boxers around his ankles, Mr. Woodcock like a radar pointing straight at Mrs. Hoo-Ha and Spongebob staring at us on the TV behind him!
Monday, April 13, 2009
Monday Minutes
Just a recap of the last few days:
Thursday after Nisha, the 15 y/o, comes home from school she tells me she's gay. I guess she was looking for a shock-face from me, but didn't get one. My reply, "As long as you're happy." Then she changes her mind. She decides she's got a girlfriend, but she's also too boy crazy to be gay, so she's going to be bi. "As long as you are happy baby girl." I let it go. She followed me around the house telling me more about this new girlfriend of hers and I just listened.
Friday I tried my hand at canning. That's right... I canned. I made some applesauce (cuz nothing beats homemade applesauce) and canned it. It worked! Ahhh, the simple pleasures lol. Nisha was away at a vocal competition all day and they took 2nd place! Go girl! Then after school Nisha tells me she's being ridiculed for being gay. She looked so sad. Then she tells me it was just a joke and she's not really gay, but she certainly didn't like the way kids were being so mean about it. "As long as your happy baby girl, but now you see it's not so nice to poke fun about something so serious huh?" She agreed.
Friday night Andy and I go out for the dart tournament and a drama filled night at the bar. Ugh. Two of our friends had birthdays coming up, so that was the designated night to par-tay! All was good for most of the night until everyone who boycotted our home bar because one of the birthday girls (who happened to be a bartender there) was 86'd and fired the night before wanted to show up at that bar. Why? What was the point? "Hey, we are boycotting your bar but we are going to act like a bunch of heathens and show up here just to prove a point." Ridiculous. Andy and I left right after we got there. Got us some drunk burgers from Mickey D's and passed out at home.
Saturday we did the Easter egg hunt at his mom's with the rest of the fam because of the 100% chance of rain on Sunday. Nisha rode with us and Andy's ex-wife dropped off the rest of our crew (Oh I've got story about that fiasco, but I'll save it for another time lol). Good times! I love hanging out with his family. They are really some good people. That evening a bunch of us were going to meet up at one of the nephew's houses for some drinks and fun, but my old ass was too hung over from the night before... Man I remember the days when I could party the entire weekend... So long 20's, I'm an old broad now.
Sunday we took Nisha too her dad's so she could go to church with his family. Her dad was out of town (what moron schedules a couple's retreat on Easter weekend?!?!?!) but her older sister called and asked that we bring Nisha out there and she'd bring her home. I thought that was a really nice gesture. Nisha sometimes feels left out of their lives and I know it made her feel all warm and fuzzy... especially since her own daddy didn't even call to say Happy Easter! Sense some animosity? Perhaps.
Andy and I spent a lazy day on the couch watching Big Love and eating snackies. I really enjoy my lazy days with him, especially when I get him all to myself. I love having all the kids together and I love being a mommy, but our alone time is precious to me too. It's an odd feeling to me. In past relationships I would have felt smothered, but with Andy I can't get enough. I'd rather be curled up next to him on the couch than out and about. It's a great feeling. A really great feeling.
And today... I've got work until noon, homework until 5 and then class tonight. Somewhere in there I'll get supper started so we can eat before I head to class. This is the 4th of 5 weeks of Intro to Holocaust. Tonight Nisha and Andy will do their ritual bonding time while I'm away. I love that they have quality time too. Nisha really loves him to pieces, and I know he feels the same about her.
So I guess I should get busy with my day huh?
Thursday after Nisha, the 15 y/o, comes home from school she tells me she's gay. I guess she was looking for a shock-face from me, but didn't get one. My reply, "As long as you're happy." Then she changes her mind. She decides she's got a girlfriend, but she's also too boy crazy to be gay, so she's going to be bi. "As long as you are happy baby girl." I let it go. She followed me around the house telling me more about this new girlfriend of hers and I just listened.
Friday I tried my hand at canning. That's right... I canned. I made some applesauce (cuz nothing beats homemade applesauce) and canned it. It worked! Ahhh, the simple pleasures lol. Nisha was away at a vocal competition all day and they took 2nd place! Go girl! Then after school Nisha tells me she's being ridiculed for being gay. She looked so sad. Then she tells me it was just a joke and she's not really gay, but she certainly didn't like the way kids were being so mean about it. "As long as your happy baby girl, but now you see it's not so nice to poke fun about something so serious huh?" She agreed.
Friday night Andy and I go out for the dart tournament and a drama filled night at the bar. Ugh. Two of our friends had birthdays coming up, so that was the designated night to par-tay! All was good for most of the night until everyone who boycotted our home bar because one of the birthday girls (who happened to be a bartender there) was 86'd and fired the night before wanted to show up at that bar. Why? What was the point? "Hey, we are boycotting your bar but we are going to act like a bunch of heathens and show up here just to prove a point." Ridiculous. Andy and I left right after we got there. Got us some drunk burgers from Mickey D's and passed out at home.
Saturday we did the Easter egg hunt at his mom's with the rest of the fam because of the 100% chance of rain on Sunday. Nisha rode with us and Andy's ex-wife dropped off the rest of our crew (Oh I've got story about that fiasco, but I'll save it for another time lol). Good times! I love hanging out with his family. They are really some good people. That evening a bunch of us were going to meet up at one of the nephew's houses for some drinks and fun, but my old ass was too hung over from the night before... Man I remember the days when I could party the entire weekend... So long 20's, I'm an old broad now.
Sunday we took Nisha too her dad's so she could go to church with his family. Her dad was out of town (what moron schedules a couple's retreat on Easter weekend?!?!?!) but her older sister called and asked that we bring Nisha out there and she'd bring her home. I thought that was a really nice gesture. Nisha sometimes feels left out of their lives and I know it made her feel all warm and fuzzy... especially since her own daddy didn't even call to say Happy Easter! Sense some animosity? Perhaps.
Andy and I spent a lazy day on the couch watching Big Love and eating snackies. I really enjoy my lazy days with him, especially when I get him all to myself. I love having all the kids together and I love being a mommy, but our alone time is precious to me too. It's an odd feeling to me. In past relationships I would have felt smothered, but with Andy I can't get enough. I'd rather be curled up next to him on the couch than out and about. It's a great feeling. A really great feeling.
And today... I've got work until noon, homework until 5 and then class tonight. Somewhere in there I'll get supper started so we can eat before I head to class. This is the 4th of 5 weeks of Intro to Holocaust. Tonight Nisha and Andy will do their ritual bonding time while I'm away. I love that they have quality time too. Nisha really loves him to pieces, and I know he feels the same about her.
So I guess I should get busy with my day huh?
Friday, April 10, 2009
High Five Friday: The Five Love Languages
Over turkey break I read this book. It's really a worthwhile read. Oddly enough, this is a book Andy had and shared with me. Not your typical man-book, but this man is full of surprises and is actually one who cares about communication and how to make a relationship better. I tend to be the "I don't want to talk about it" one in our relationship, while he's much more open and likes to get things out on the table. I think he feels if we aren't talking about something, there is a barrier and that's not healthy in a relationship. I agree, but I still suck at the communication part.
Anyway... this book made me realize something imperative to all relationships, whether it be significant other, children, parents, friends, work relationships - anyone. We don't all process or show our needs the same way.
Gary Chapman actually has a website dedicated to this idea. I urge you to check it out. Might even be able to do the quiz on there. I'm the queen of quizzes. I love the quizzes in magazines and online that tell you what kind of lover you are, if you are romantic, if you are an under-cover freak, etc. I LOVE quizzes. I know they aren't based on anything scientific and are just mutterings of another bored person, but I still think they are fun lol.
So... what are the love languages you ask? (Just pretend you asked dang it!)
- Words of Affirmation: Receiving words of adoration, comforting words, ego-stroking words, words of praise and kind words. Is it really important to you that your s/o (significant other) write you love letters or poems, give words of praise to your strengths, and compliment you in front of your friends and family? Does it mean the world to you to overhear your s/o telling someone else how great you are?
- Quality Time: The central aspect of quality time is togetherness; not proximity but focused attention. Quality time doesn't only include the minivacations or weekend getaways couples sometimes take to renew their relationship. Is it important to you that you receive eye contact when you are trying to talk to your s/o? Or that they are not multitasking when you are speaking to them and concentrating only on the conversation you are having, without them interrupting? What about them recapping the conversation, showing you that they fully understood your feelings. For instance if they were to say, "It sounds to me like you are feeling ______ about this situation." Is it important to you that your s/o and you have a devoted time each day to talk about the daily goings-on in your life? Do you feel more secure in your relationship when you do quality activities together? Are lunch dates, picnics at the beach or strolls at the park important to you?
- Receiving Gifts: Do you feel more loved when you receive gifts? Not only material things but the gift of your s/o's time and attention as well? Is it important to you that your s/o leave a box of chocolates for you or bring you home a rose for no apparent reason? What about a book they thought you might enjoy or a handmade gift, a painting or family picture collage? What about a Hallmark card professing their undying love for you out of the blue? Of course, we would all be excited at the thought of a new car, but what about new miniblinds for the livingroom that you set your eye on or an electric drill b/c the old one isn't quite functioning right anymore? Or even the gift of their time and presence spent at a community event they said they weren't going to attend with you?
- Acts of Service: These are simple and yet to some are so very important. Is it important to you that your s/o help with daily duties at the house? Making the bed in the morning, fixing coffee for you even though they don't like it? Packing a lunch for you to take to work? What about helping out with cleaning up the kids' bedroom while you are fixing supper so you don't have to do it later? Fixing supper for you? Cleaning up the kitchen after supper? Washing the car or taking the car to get the oil changed instead of waiting on you to do it? What about before you are expecting company and they help get the house tidied up? Do things like this mean the world to you?
- Physical Touch: Is it meaningful to you to have your s/o reach for your hand while you are in the car together? Or sitting on the couch watching the tube? Or walking around the department store? What about during times of crisis, do you feel like the situation would be much better if they held you? What about foot massages and back rubs? Do you feel most secure and loved when there is mind-numbing foreplay before sex? What about during supper at the table and your s/o plays footsies with you? Or when lying in bed, is it important that your s/o drape a leg over yours or have a hand on your back? Fiddling with your hair or caressing your neck? What about hugs and kisses every time they leave the house and again when they come back in? Or even when you are out in public, is it important to you that your s/o put their arm around you or shower you with kisses and pats on the butt?
I know all of these things are important in relationships, but put each of these five in order of importance to you. It's interesting also to see how your s/o puts their list in order. Your first love language may not be the same as your s/o! And even if you are single, it helps determine what you expect and how to address what a potential s/o expects!
Apparently we all have a "Love Tank" and when our needs aren't being met, our love tank isn't full. Sucks to be running on fumes man, it really sucks. The point is, what works for me may not work for Andy. For instance, if you are more of a Physical Touch person, but your s/o is Words of Affirmation... rubbing his shoulders isn't going to fill his Love Tank like telling him he's the bombdigity will. If you are the type who likes to Receive Gifts... when he tells you he loves you, it isn't going to do the trick.
I'm selfish. I have a hard time processing the needs of others any different than I would process mine. I have to actually step back from the issue and left-brain think it through before I know which way to go. It's not a natural thing for me. When folks are down, more specifically, when Andy's Love Tank isn't full (and you definitely know when your man's Love Tank isn't full) I tend to think of what I would want in that situation. Ba ha! Wrong answer! This book focuses on us giving them what they need in that situation, and how to effectively communicate what we need.
And to top this wonderful "ta-da" type moment book... there is a quiz! Yippee! You fill out your answers, and your s/o fills out the same quiz. Then you have this revelation of knowing for all these years (or months in our case) that you've been trying to fill their tank with what you would fill your own tank. It's like putting unleaded in a diesel engine. Just doesn't work.
Ok I'm done rambling about this. I just kind of had one of those step back moments last night when I realized my poor Andy is feeling neglected. I've noticed for the last couple of days his mood was different, but it didn't hit me until last night... that man is living on a half-empty tank. Shame on me because my tank is full!
If you are reading this Andy (because yesterday I finally gave him the link to my blog lol)... I love you very much and this weekend I'm gonna fill your tank baby! I'm gonna fill it up real good! *wink wink*
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
Wednesday Woes
Didn't sleep well last night, and every morning lately I've been waking up at 5 am. ACK! Well this morning I decided to get out of bed and be productive before the rest of the house was up. By 6:15 I had the livingroom and hallway swept and Murphy's on the floors. By 6:20 I realized that my floors need MUCH more attention, and I'll be calling my sissy, the expertive on wood floors, later this morning. Since she lives in Cali, the urge to call her at 6:20 am my time was subsided by the knowledge that I would be cussed out for waking her up at 4:20 am with questions of proper wood floor maintenance.
The household is up by 6:30 and ready to rock and roll by 7:15. Poptarts and chocolate milk for breakfast for the little ones (oh yeah, I'm a health nut) and the big one eats at school (at least she says she does). Andy doesn't do breakfast, so his routine morning coffee was enough for him.
I run to 7-Eleven to get cash for the teen b/c the mom of the year forgot she had to turn in her money today for their field trip to Arbuckle for a vocal competition.
We get Baby Love and Monkey Boy all tucked into their carseats, the teen ready to roll with her cappuchino money in hand. I move the polly-cart to the side of the house (trash day was yesterday) and politely remind Andy our house is a pit because we don't put thinks away after we are done with them. Hug and kiss everybody and Andy drives away.
I'm in a good mood! Normally I'm a grouch in the mornings, and I figured since I was up before the buttcrack of dawn today, I would be extra grouchy. Not the case...
Until I walk back in the house.
Poptart crumbs all on the floor in the newly swept and mopped livingroom. Grrrr!
While I'm sweeping that back up, I notice that half the kitchen cabinets are open. Grrrr!
Seriously... why does that happen? I mean, does it take that much more effort to close the damn cabinet than it did to open it? I sent Andy into the kitchen to make his own lunch this morning b/c I had to run to the ATM. Normally this is my job. I like it. Feels like I'm doing something special for him and he appreciates it...at least I tell him he appreciates it. I pack a lunch with sides (usually leftovers), an orange, a tangelo, and a small container of this powder fiber crap that he thinks he needs lol. Today I do a bag check and he's got a hamburger patty with cheese over it, no sides and no fruit. But he didn't forget his damn fiber! So I get him a small baggy of chips and throw it in there and he tells me he's got an orange left at work. Whatever. He just didn't want me to know he can't pack a lunch.
Anyway... I'm in the kitchen, closing all the open cabinets and then I notice every damn light in the house is on, along with every TV.
It never ends.
The household is up by 6:30 and ready to rock and roll by 7:15. Poptarts and chocolate milk for breakfast for the little ones (oh yeah, I'm a health nut) and the big one eats at school (at least she says she does). Andy doesn't do breakfast, so his routine morning coffee was enough for him.
I run to 7-Eleven to get cash for the teen b/c the mom of the year forgot she had to turn in her money today for their field trip to Arbuckle for a vocal competition.
We get Baby Love and Monkey Boy all tucked into their carseats, the teen ready to roll with her cappuchino money in hand. I move the polly-cart to the side of the house (trash day was yesterday) and politely remind Andy our house is a pit because we don't put thinks away after we are done with them. Hug and kiss everybody and Andy drives away.
I'm in a good mood! Normally I'm a grouch in the mornings, and I figured since I was up before the buttcrack of dawn today, I would be extra grouchy. Not the case...
Until I walk back in the house.
Poptart crumbs all on the floor in the newly swept and mopped livingroom. Grrrr!
While I'm sweeping that back up, I notice that half the kitchen cabinets are open. Grrrr!
Seriously... why does that happen? I mean, does it take that much more effort to close the damn cabinet than it did to open it? I sent Andy into the kitchen to make his own lunch this morning b/c I had to run to the ATM. Normally this is my job. I like it. Feels like I'm doing something special for him and he appreciates it...at least I tell him he appreciates it. I pack a lunch with sides (usually leftovers), an orange, a tangelo, and a small container of this powder fiber crap that he thinks he needs lol. Today I do a bag check and he's got a hamburger patty with cheese over it, no sides and no fruit. But he didn't forget his damn fiber! So I get him a small baggy of chips and throw it in there and he tells me he's got an orange left at work. Whatever. He just didn't want me to know he can't pack a lunch.
Anyway... I'm in the kitchen, closing all the open cabinets and then I notice every damn light in the house is on, along with every TV.
It never ends.
Monday, April 6, 2009
Poopsie Daisy
It's Monday morning, and so far, the day is shitty... literally.
The kids I watch during the day have an awful bout of squirts. Baby K, 10 months, has saturated her clothes already and her mom sent the handy dandy buttwipe container only HALF FULL today. Nice. She has a God-awful rash and screams everytime I change her diaper. I manage to get elbow deep in poop and butt-paste. Poor baby, just breaks my heart :(
Then Big K runs to the toilet earlier and hollers for me.
Big K: Denise!
Me: What? (A rhetorical question mind you. I figured it was the routine "wipe my butt" conversation we have at least once a day)
Big K: There is poop in my panties.
Me: (Walking down the hall toward the bathroom) Did you poop your pants K?
Big K: Nope.
Me: Then how is there poop in your panties?
Big K: I don't know. But there is poop in there. Look. (she points)
Me: Yep, you're right. There's poop in there. Lets get them off so I can wash them. Stand up so I can wipe your butt.
Big K: I can't.
Me: Why?
Big K: Because I have poop on my butt.
Me: Are you done pooping?
Big K: Yes.
Me: Then stand up.
Big K: I can't. The poop is stuck.
I get the child to stand up and sure enough, there's poop stuck to her butt. Poor kid. This is the kid who can't stand touching dirt, anything sticky, washes her hands constantly and freaks out if she spills something on her clothes.
So me, being super mom *cough cough*, I go in for the wipe... and my damn hoodie strings jump out of nowhere and land right in the poop blob just as I go to wipe. Now I've got poop stuck to my dangling string, a stinky kid in one hand and toilet paper in the other! Nobody move! Gross!
All I can do is shake my head.
So I finish up with Big K and the phone rings. I rip off my hoodie, take the poo'ed panties, Baby K's onsie and pants and throw them all in the washer so I can answer the phone. It was my beloved Andy calling for the 4th time today; the first time to tell me to have a good day (aww how sweet), the second time to tell me that I forgot to sign the check for the water bill so they are sending it back to me (ditz I swear, and I was trying to be so organized!) and the third time was to tell me he got a quote at Geico that could save us $15/month LOL.
Andy: Whatcha doin?
Me: Seriously?
So I tell him the shitty stories I had so far and then proceed to tell him exactly how much toilet paper we've used since the 1st. TEN flippin rolls of toilet paper VANISHED in five days! I'm the toilet paper nazi I guess, being that I even took the time to count the rolls. I think it's mostly because I changed the roll 9 of the damn TEN times it needed to be changed.
Andy: Well, it wasn't me. I don't even use toilet paper when I poop.
Me: I'm hanging up now.
Ok ok, he's trying to be funny. He DOES wipe his butt, I promise. I think. God I hope so!
The kids I watch during the day have an awful bout of squirts. Baby K, 10 months, has saturated her clothes already and her mom sent the handy dandy buttwipe container only HALF FULL today. Nice. She has a God-awful rash and screams everytime I change her diaper. I manage to get elbow deep in poop and butt-paste. Poor baby, just breaks my heart :(
Then Big K runs to the toilet earlier and hollers for me.
Big K: Denise!
Me: What? (A rhetorical question mind you. I figured it was the routine "wipe my butt" conversation we have at least once a day)
Big K: There is poop in my panties.
Me: (Walking down the hall toward the bathroom) Did you poop your pants K?
Big K: Nope.
Me: Then how is there poop in your panties?
Big K: I don't know. But there is poop in there. Look. (she points)
Me: Yep, you're right. There's poop in there. Lets get them off so I can wash them. Stand up so I can wipe your butt.
Big K: I can't.
Me: Why?
Big K: Because I have poop on my butt.
Me: Are you done pooping?
Big K: Yes.
Me: Then stand up.
Big K: I can't. The poop is stuck.
I get the child to stand up and sure enough, there's poop stuck to her butt. Poor kid. This is the kid who can't stand touching dirt, anything sticky, washes her hands constantly and freaks out if she spills something on her clothes.
So me, being super mom *cough cough*, I go in for the wipe... and my damn hoodie strings jump out of nowhere and land right in the poop blob just as I go to wipe. Now I've got poop stuck to my dangling string, a stinky kid in one hand and toilet paper in the other! Nobody move! Gross!
All I can do is shake my head.
So I finish up with Big K and the phone rings. I rip off my hoodie, take the poo'ed panties, Baby K's onsie and pants and throw them all in the washer so I can answer the phone. It was my beloved Andy calling for the 4th time today; the first time to tell me to have a good day (aww how sweet), the second time to tell me that I forgot to sign the check for the water bill so they are sending it back to me (ditz I swear, and I was trying to be so organized!) and the third time was to tell me he got a quote at Geico that could save us $15/month LOL.
Andy: Whatcha doin?
Me: Seriously?
So I tell him the shitty stories I had so far and then proceed to tell him exactly how much toilet paper we've used since the 1st. TEN flippin rolls of toilet paper VANISHED in five days! I'm the toilet paper nazi I guess, being that I even took the time to count the rolls. I think it's mostly because I changed the roll 9 of the damn TEN times it needed to be changed.
Andy: Well, it wasn't me. I don't even use toilet paper when I poop.
Me: I'm hanging up now.
Ok ok, he's trying to be funny. He DOES wipe his butt, I promise. I think. God I hope so!
Monday, March 23, 2009
You are in BIG TROUBLE Mister!
So I'm up at 5:30 this morning, determined to get a head start on work before the kids get here. All seems to be going well... I'm working, laundry is going, and the house is quiet. Then Nish gets up, shortly followed by Andy. Why in God's name are they up so early? Couldn't be the 4 hours naps we all took yesterday until about 7 pm LOL!
At about 7, I'm in the kitchen doing my normal routine. I get Andy's lunch ready for work, get coffee fixed and get his fancy schmancy coffee cup we got him for Christmas out to take to work and then shove Andy and Nish out the door about 7:30. Well... I can't find the coffee cup. This isn't just your ordinary thermos style coffee mug mind you. I had is specially designed for him. SPECIALLY DESIGNED FOR HIM!
Ever seen those stickers on cars?
They look kinda like that. Well, I didn't want one on the truck b/c I wanted our real names on there, and I thought that was just a bit invasive to plaster on our vehicle like that. So after an exhaustive search (30 seconds on Google) I found a site that custom makes coffee mugs, mouse pads, decals, etc., and you get to design the people, including their attire, hair style, age, and then name them all.
I picked out an aluminum coffee mug for him and put us plus our four kids on there. It was too cute! So cute I couldn't wait until Christmas to give it to him and let him open it early.
Anyhoo -
He takes that cup to work everyday. I'm looking for it in the dishwasher. Nope. Cabinet... Nope. Sink... NOPE! I'm getting pissed. I ask him to go look in the truck. He finally reveals.... "I must have left it at the office."
That would have been fine if it were the OFFICE that he goes to EVERYDAY! But noooooooooo, it's at the office that he went to for 2 days last week, the office that he hardly ever goes to. Granted, it's a mile from our house, but it closes too early for him to get there after he gets off, and I have no idea when he'll be there next. And it's too far away from the office he's at normally to make it there during lunch and get back on time.
So I'm pissed. He's in trouble. Big trouble! I specially designed that dang cup for him! I fill it EVERY morning with his dang coffee and send him out the door with hot java and smooches every morning! How the hell do ya forget your cup!?!?
I let him know, repeatedly, that he's in big trouble until he gets his cup back.
7:30 a.m. I shove him out the door with smooches, a glare and no coffee cup.
11:13 a.m. I get picture mail on my celly.
Got my cup back! See?
LMAO. He apparently worked some magic and had someone bring the cup to him. See why I love this man! I informed him he was safe to come home now and not fear for his life. It's a beautiful day!
At about 7, I'm in the kitchen doing my normal routine. I get Andy's lunch ready for work, get coffee fixed and get his fancy schmancy coffee cup we got him for Christmas out to take to work and then shove Andy and Nish out the door about 7:30. Well... I can't find the coffee cup. This isn't just your ordinary thermos style coffee mug mind you. I had is specially designed for him. SPECIALLY DESIGNED FOR HIM!
Ever seen those stickers on cars?
They look kinda like that. Well, I didn't want one on the truck b/c I wanted our real names on there, and I thought that was just a bit invasive to plaster on our vehicle like that. So after an exhaustive search (30 seconds on Google) I found a site that custom makes coffee mugs, mouse pads, decals, etc., and you get to design the people, including their attire, hair style, age, and then name them all.
I picked out an aluminum coffee mug for him and put us plus our four kids on there. It was too cute! So cute I couldn't wait until Christmas to give it to him and let him open it early.
Anyhoo -
He takes that cup to work everyday. I'm looking for it in the dishwasher. Nope. Cabinet... Nope. Sink... NOPE! I'm getting pissed. I ask him to go look in the truck. He finally reveals.... "I must have left it at the office."
That would have been fine if it were the OFFICE that he goes to EVERYDAY! But noooooooooo, it's at the office that he went to for 2 days last week, the office that he hardly ever goes to. Granted, it's a mile from our house, but it closes too early for him to get there after he gets off, and I have no idea when he'll be there next. And it's too far away from the office he's at normally to make it there during lunch and get back on time.
So I'm pissed. He's in trouble. Big trouble! I specially designed that dang cup for him! I fill it EVERY morning with his dang coffee and send him out the door with hot java and smooches every morning! How the hell do ya forget your cup!?!?
I let him know, repeatedly, that he's in big trouble until he gets his cup back.
7:30 a.m. I shove him out the door with smooches, a glare and no coffee cup.
11:13 a.m. I get picture mail on my celly.
Got my cup back! See?
LMAO. He apparently worked some magic and had someone bring the cup to him. See why I love this man! I informed him he was safe to come home now and not fear for his life. It's a beautiful day!
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