Spongebob vs. Mr. Woodcock

Here's another dream... or one that I can't remember! Grrr!

So I'm dreaming along one morning, minding my own business, and I feel Andy stirring in bed. I continue with my dream. I remember being partly awake because I made a mental note to remember my dream so I could tell Andy about it later.

Well, Andy wakes me up with morning wood (or Woo-Hoo for the Sims players)... and what else could be a better alarm clock than morning nookie fo'real... and before I roll over with my ready-and-waiting look (yanno the one... nightgown up to my boobs from tossing and turning all night, slobber on the side of my face, eye-goo and hair in knots look) his words were, "I can't do this while you are watching Spongebob!"

Mind you, I fell asleep with the TV on and I'm still asleep, or at least halfway asleep... but I never turn down morning wood. *Gasp*

I roll over, half-way giggle, wipe the slobber from my face and give him the come hither look, trying to bat my eye-booger matted eyes and I'm sure a green fog coming from my mouth.

So, for the last few days I've been trying to remember my flippin dream and the only thing I can remember was the very last scene before my eyes were completely open... Andy about to soar onto the bed, t-shirt on and boxers around his ankles, Mr. Woodcock like a radar pointing straight at Mrs. Hoo-Ha and Spongebob staring at us on the TV behind him!

I Figured out my "Bear"

I've been talking with my sister, who is much more atune to the planetary involvement in my life than I (yes, I have had charts drawn up and do think if the atmosphere can control the tides of seas, it certainly has a bearing on my being as well), about my bear sightings as of late. It's a weird feeling to stand back from yourself and take a gander at what has been going on. And hard to do. So I call my sissy to help me figure things out and to get another perspective. She knows me so well and thinks outside the box.

Anyhoo - We had a fiascal (yeah, that's right, fiascal is really a word in the dictionary of my head) Wednesday night. Our 15 y/o has a friend who has been talking about running away. I guess she deemed last night to be "the night". She made claims of being hit at home by a drunken parent, a step-parent who works at some unknown bar who leaves for work at 4:30 in the morning and doesn't come home until the wee hours of the night, a bio mom in another state that she is at odds with, and no other local family to turn to. Ok... I smell lies. Regardless, there is a teenager at my door in the middle of the night with her bags packed and obviously in distress, not to mention a nice little red mark on her face showing the alleged assault.

Without getting into too much detail here, Andy and I decided we would be the "safe house" for ONE NIGHT only, but the next morning she would have to let her father know where she was. Half of me didn't even want to go that far and I figured her father or the police would be at my door before sun-up looking for her. At this point I thought her father knew where we lived, since this kid is at my house EVERY single school day from the time she gets out of school until about 5 pm, but I later learned she kept that a secret from her dad (imagine that!).

We made it through the night without the police or her father. Andy took the girls to school like normal and then called the principal to give her heads up. I know the principal personally and love her to pieces. She has kept a watchful eye out on my kid since she has been in that school and couldn't be more grateful.

We did our part and informed the school who then had to proceed with their legal obligations of notifying the father, the police and of course CPS b/c of the alleged abuse. All we had to go on was the words of this kid, whether we believed them or not, we had to get folks involved. Turns out this kid really needs some serious counseling. Her father reported her missing to the police that night, but there wasn't much that could be done... and from what I've learned, this isn't the first episode for this child.

We learned so much about this whole ordeal from a source who will remain a mystery, but a source I totally trust, and I've come to the conclusion that whether the allegations are true or not, this child needs help. She is crying out for something and the road ahead will be a long one, for both she and her parents, if she doesn't learn how to cope and deal with whatever is eating at her.

Point of this whole story is... she was my bear. The interpretation of my dream is this: The gun that I couldn't reload in the dream represented the extend of the help I could offer. I threw up my hands that night and told Andy I didn't know how to handle this... so I stayed in bed while he let the girl in and talked to her about the situation. I let the bear near him. The bear nearly attacking Andy was a sign that there was something coming that neigher one of us would be able to handle alone and we would have to call for some help. Before I even realized she was my bear, the minute we talked to the school principal, I felt an emormous load lifted from my shoulders, and so did Andy.

Lions and Tigers and Bears OH MY!

"Dreams are illusions... from the book your soul is writing about you." Martha Norman

So the other night I had a dream that a bear was chasing Andy. He was trying to distract the bear from me so that I could shoot it. Sounds easy enough. Well, from all my hours playing Hunting Unlimited 2009 (complete addict) I knew that if I hit the bear in the forehead, the bullet would slide right off the top of his head and wouldn't kill him. So I had to choose my shot carefully. Well, this wasn't a game and I was frantic! And to top it off, I only had a shotgun. TWO bullets. I aimed, shot, missed. Aimed, shot, hit the bear, but didn't stop him.

Here's where panic overtook me. The bear is coming straight for Andy and I didn't know how to reload the gun. I don't even know if I had more ammo, all I knew was reloading wasn't a task I'd ever been shown. I was going to watch the love of my life be eaten by an angry black bear!

Usually, I have the ability, while still sleeping, to stop the dream, rewind the scene and direct it the way I want it to go. Tonight was different. I couldn't redirect the bear. The same scene just played over and over again and I woke up in a cold sweat, heart beating outside of my chest and body trembling. I was almost in tears as I reached out for Andy to make sure he was still there.

HORRIFYING!

So the next morning I remembered the dream and told Andy what had happened. He was appalled that I would let him get torn to shreds by a bear. He thought it was funny at first, but quickly changed his mind. I couldn't help it. I did manage to stop the dream before he was eaten alive, thus it has no ending. And I couldn't find the clear meaning of the dream. For the life of me I couldn't put that dream into perspective. Other than the fact that he needs to make sure I know how to use and LOAD a damn gun. We have guns in the house. For arguments sake, lets say an intruder comes in while he's gone away to some hunting or fishing trip and I'm alone with the kids. What the hell am I going to do to save my family? I believe I'd blow a robbers head off if I felt there was danger, but HOW with no BULLETS???

Anyway... the following week Manny, the 3-year-old, wakes up at 6 a.m. and crawls in bed with us. "Daddy, I'm scared".

"Why son?"

"The dinosaurs are going to get me."

"Don't be scared son, I'll kill the dinosaurs," as he squeezes him in closer, protecting Manny. We all snuggle up together, covers pulled up close to our faces.

Shortly after, we all get up and Manny heads to the hall bathroom while Andy is getting our girls up.

"Dad... watch out for the bear!" Manny hollers from the bathroom.

Needless to say, I'm a little freaked out but I don't say anything. How did Manny know about the bear? Hmmm. Something is off kilter. A threatening feeling, but I'm not sure what it's about.

I honestly believe that our subconscious mind tries to warn us about certain things. It tries to protect us from events or situations that we might have otherwise avoided, or it uses dreams to make us aware of something that is or could be coming our way.

Manny and I are apparently incahoots on something... I just wish I knew more.